Монах Хосе де Сигуенса: «Разница между работами этого человека и работами других художников заключается в том, что другие стараются изобразить людей такими, какие они есть снаружи. Босху же хватает мужества изобразить их такими, какими они есть изнутри».
БОСХ
Этот странный художник Босх.
Я слышу свист плетки: хлест, хлест!
«Вот твой портрет.
Не снаружи, а изнутри.
Не нравится? Не смотри».
«Какая ерунда! – говорю я. -
Так это ж, извините, свинья!»
«Может быть. Не знаю, -
говорит Босх, -
У вас левая сторона такая».
Хлест, хлест!
Я как-то забрел в Хертогенбос,
Чтобы задать Босху вопрос:
«Для чего вы выворачиваете людей наизнанку?»
Он мне ответил как-то странно, видно, спозаранку:
«Как на дыбы
надо бы».
«Изнутри, изнутри я какой?»
«Закажи Босху свой портрет.
Пусть он вывернет тебя наизнанку,
Снимет с тебя маску.
И все увидят, что ты не ангел, а черт».
Я зову тебя своим святым.
Ты не святой, увы.
Это я знала давно,
Но закрывала глаза.
Твои рожки, спрятанные в рыжей шевелюре,
Иногда щекотали мою шею,
И мне было приятно.
Какая разница, думала я, кто меня ласкает -
Ангел или черт?
Путь будет черт, если ангелы перевелись.
Ведь и черт – ангел,
Только падший.
Он склонил голову на мою грудь
И сказал: «Забудь, забудь!
Какая разница, кто я?
В чувствах к тебе – правда моя.
Тебе со мной хорошо?
Что еще?»
Я люблю не живую женщину,
Я люблю ее образ живой.
Ты лишь любишь мое понятие,
А не меня самого.
Ты лишь любишь мое распятие.
Непонятно только за что.
Мы жили всегда в разлуке,
Держа свою память в напряжении,
Встречались порой ради скуки
И расходились без всякого сожаления.
Но что-то держало нас вместе.
Что? Этого никто не знал.
В далеком, далеком соседстве
Воздвиг кто-то наш пьедестал.
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Why is it I always really feel like you do?